I remember when rock was young.
The songwriters had so much fun.
They took greetings of the holiday,
And played them in a rock-and-roll way!
First came Bobby Helms in 1957 with “Jingle Bell Rock.”
Then Brenda Lee upped the ante in 1958 with “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree.”
Audiences swooned, and America’s department stores signed what can only have been an irrevocable, 200-year contract with Helms and Lee to play their songs every ten minutes from Halloween to New Year’s.
Despite near-total saturation of rock-and-roll Christmas songs, some artists have continued to inflict rock-themed songs on us. Indeed, by the 1980s, they just needed to stop:
(Go, Santa, go . . . far away from here.)
And this profusion of rock-themed ohrwurms has brought with it a hideous array of covers, which are designed to fill in all the empty spots between the original “Jingle Bell Rock” and “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” on the radio. Because we care for you, we’ll leave you with only this example: